A global support network for the LGBTIQ+ community

May 8, 2017

Will

Dear friend

Growing up I wasn't always sure about my feelin and which way to turn with my sexuality. at a small age like 3 or 4 I can remember having feelings for this girl in my basic school class and I didn't understand what was going on, all I knew was that i Iiked a girl and I would go home and think about sharing my cookies with her, lol, throughout the years I felt confuse due to religion and what I heard people say about being gay, I didnt know how to accept my self, I felt lost in a world that judge u for everything, I was ashamed, I felt like I was a disappointment to my family because of who I am even thou no one knew at that time. I start tlkin to guys so that no one would suspect anything or call me names or look at me weird, I didn't like it, I felt like I was being forced to live a life I would not be happy with, but still I had cracks and people in my community started to speculate and assume base of the fact that I dress like a boy and played sport, so I stop playing and tuned my dressing down a bit but people would still assume and tlk about me, until one day this guy came up to me and ask me if I'm gay, I was furious that he did this so I then replied, are u gay, he laughed at me, with a confused look on his face, he apologized and said sorry if I offended u but my reason for asking is because I have a friend and she likes you (profiling) I thought to myself but being a sarcastic asshole I answered, "congratulations", not gonna lie once he said (she) I was excited and anxious but I kept my cool and played nonchalant, he kept asking questions and telling how he accepted lesbians stuff, I was surprised, this dude talking to me about female to female? And cool about it, there had to be more, I was so Intrigue by what he was say we stood there for like a hour talking and the more he talked the more comfortable I got... Finally I went home, sat on my bed and thought to myself, whose life is this? And for the whole night I stayed up thinking until it finally hit me, regardless of what u do in life u will always be judged, why? I was judging him at first because I didn't know him or his reason for approaching me and that's the problem when we don't know something we tend to make our own answers even when we are wrong. That's what I was doing making my own answer when all I needed to do was find it, be patient, and accept myself for who I and and that was the the key findin who I am. Today I can say I'm proud to be gay loving a woman is what I want with MY life

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